18-year-old cries after her dad made her childhood bedroom into a guest room as soon as she left for college: 'If I knew he was going to pack up my things and get rid of my room I wouldn't have gone to this college.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Sep 8, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

How long can you store your stuff at your parents' house before they tell you to get it out of there? I know people who are in their 40s with kids who still have their childhood junk in their parents' garage because they never bothered to take it out. If you have your own home with an attic and a garage, you should certainly get your old belongings out of your aging parent's house as soon as possible. If you're in college and living in a dorm room or a student apartment, there's no reason your parents should force you to move all of your stuff out of their house, especially if you're going to move out of your dorm in 8 months anyway. It's way more convenient to keep a young adult's stuff at their parents' house if they are moving regularly throughout their late teens and early twenties, as many young adults are. People tend to stay in one house/apartment longer when they're a little older than 19. Once an adult child is in a more stable living situation, it might be time for them to leave their childhood home. 

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  • The dad in this story was a bit premature in trying to get rid of any trace that his daughter ever lived in his house. He cleaned out her room as soon as she moved out for college, which upset her immensely. 

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    A woman sitting on a bed with a laptop
    via Yunus Tuğ (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    Am I wrong for being angry at my dad for packing up all the stuff in my room to turn it into a guest room?

    I (18F) just got into college, it's a while away so I decided to dorm. My dad (40M) told me the day before I left that he was going to pack up my stuff. He said "don't be offended if I pack up your things and turn it into a guest room." I was offended and ended up crying in front of him.
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 03
    He started asking how I didn't know this and said I should've expected this because every family does this when their child goes to college. He also says that he's mentioned it before but the only things I remember him saying could easily be taken for a
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 04
    joke. He never seriously talked to me about it or asked me if I wanted this. He assumed I did because I was getting a dorm but if I knew he was going to pack up my things and get rid of my room I wouldn't have gone to this college.
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 05
    People walking near Paccar Hall University of Washington during daytime
    via Wonderlane

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 06
    This is my first year of college and I had always thought of it as like a boarding school type situation. I never thought that it was like moving out completely. I feel really depr_sed about this and I feel as if I'm being kicked out, but I'm not sure if I'm just being dramatic or not. I've talked to some people dorming near me and this hasn't happened to any of them. Is this normal?
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 07
    A couple of women sitting on top of bunk beds
    via A. C. (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 08
    WhipserMyWay Nope.. Tbh, it sounds like your dad didn't communicate this well with you at all. It isn't a universal rule that parents clear out their kid's room once they hit college, it varies from fam to fam. Try to tell him how you feel and also the dorm's just a temp spot and doesn't replace your home.
    via u/WhipserMyWay
  • 09
    Timely Apricot3929 It's also OP's first year at college. OP just got there. It's a huge transition and pretty emotionally inept for the father to immediately box up her things the second she leaves. How many guests does he have coming over that this needed to be done right away??
    via u/Timely_Apricot3929
  • 10
    No-Combination3941 OP Hi! We really barely have any guests, just the occasional family that comes over. Maybe he packed it up right away because my grandma did come over the weekend before I arrived. I'm not entirely sure though.
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 11
    Timely Apricot3929 I mean, were your things making the room uninhabitable for your grandma?
    via u/Timely_Apricot3929
  • 12
    No-Combination3941 OP Nope, I made sure to clean it up before I left so it was pretty nice when I left it.
    via u/No-Combination3941
  • 13
    Charming Narwhal_970 Hey Dad, nobody does this! Kids are home from college four months of the year! I wanted my kids to know they always had a home with me
    via u/Charming_Narwhal_970
  • 14
    OldDiamondJim Lots of families do this. Dad is being insensitive, but come on.
    via u/OldDiamondJim
  • 15
    ssmit102 A lot of families do this or something similar. I knew my parents always had a place for me, but we grew up with 6 in a 3 bedroom place... always having your own bedroom is a luxury that many people do not have.
    via u/ssmit102
  • 16
    Charming_Narwhal_970 Except OP had her own room. Her father did not have to box all her stuff. Using it while she's not there for whatever reason is one thing, or having her move rooms before she goes to better accommodation the family could have been better, but the way this was handled made her feel like she didn't have a place there any longer.
    via u/Charming_Narwhal_970
  • 17
    Think_Storm_8909 I will never understand this. When I moved out my parents didn't change a thing in my room. They occasionally use my room for storage or guests but it's still my room. If I were to move back in with them I would find my room just as I left it when I moved out. Op i know it hurts but I don't think there is nothing you can do. What you can do is make some place your own home and treat your future kids like you want to be treated
    via u/Think_Storm_8909
  • 18
    TimeDue2994 H_I my kids have long gone through college and grad school and one is a navy officer and we moved houses after they graduated and they have their own (rented) home and they still have their own bedrooms here as long as they aren't married and purchased a house they will have their own bedrooms (and probably even then)
    via u/TimeDue2994
  • 19
    gonuckinfuts my parents moved to a different state my sophomore year of college and made sure to buy a house where me and my brother (who is 2 years older than me and had his own apartment near our home town) had our own rooms, and they brought all our stuff down. new furniture and beds, but dresser/closet/under the bed was all our stuff i can't even imagine how OP feels. definitely not normal
    via u/gonuckinfuts
  • 20
    Lexa19_HK NTA this isn't normal behavior of a loving parent. Dorms are temporary living situations they are not your new home. You're right to think of it kind of like boarding school in that way. Some dorms even make you leave during winter break. Does he expect you to not come home during your breaks? To him are you now just a guest? I get him converting your room into a guest room after you graduated and got your first apartment but what he did wasn't okay. You're right to feel upset.
    via u/Lexa19_HK
  • 21
    None of my friend's parents completely got rid of our rooms as we went to college. A few switched rooms so the siblings still at home could get more space but that was talked about before it happened. A few of my friends still have their childhood room in their parent's houses years after graduating college. Not because my friends insisted on it but because their parents wanted them to know they would always have a place in their home.
    via u/Lexa19_HK
  • 22
    ImmediateHeron8294 NTA. Where does your dad expect you to live during winter break (US dorms don't let you stay over winter break) or the summer? It sounds like you need to make arrangements with your school for housing during winter break. Most universities will allow you stay over winter break when you have nowhere to go. And start figuring out where you will live during the summer as it doesn't sound like your dad wants you home anymore.
    via u/ImmediateHeron8294
  • 23
    wolfyx15 H_| my sister has been out of college for over a decade is married and has her own place with her husband and kids and she still has her childhood room here with HER stuff still in it. Yes it doubles as a guest room but my parents never got rid of her stuff. They never got rid of mine when I went off to college either
    via u/wolfyx15
  • 24
    turBo246 This is weirder than what happened to OP..... If you both have your own home and families then you should go through your things and stop using your parents house as a storage facility.
    via u/turBo246
  • 25
    wolfyx15 I do not lol I unfortunately had to move back home and do not make enough to afford more own place at the moment and she rents a house with her husband they have 4 kids as well. My dad has been slowing making her get her stuff but some things remain
    via u/wolfyx15

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family drama university fatherhood bad parenting room dorm parenting dad family bedroom guest room college college student Father Parenting FAILS teens
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